Happy new year: Have you set your goals?
Hi all Happy new year :) New year brings new goals for the year. What are your goals? What do you want to achieve? What do you want the new year to bring to you?
Now you may of read some self help books that say "Set big goals" or "10X your goals" Now I know the priniciple to 10X your goals is that its best to fall short of a big goal than to hit a small one. What I don't agree with with this priniciple is that when you set an outlandish goal sometimes the mind see's this goal and says its not achievable and therefore doesnt bother to go for it. I'll give an example of a 10X goal: You may have a goal to earn £100,000 a year. Now this goal in itself may sound a big goal and setting this goal may get your mind working of how to achieve this (like buying stocks, investments, gold, online courses etc), but the 10X principle says you have to 10 times this goal. So now you have to set the goal at earning £1,000,000 a year. Now this seems a fantastic amount of money but the problem is now that your mind doesn't know how to get this huge goal and you come to conclusions like winning the lottery (which isn't a plan). I believe that when you set goals they have to be specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and time bound. SMART goals. So if I had a goal of becoming a football player and play for Real Madrid, how would that fare on being a SMART goal? Well its specific and measurable, I would surely know when I step out on that field but is it attainable? Well I am 35 year's old, for a football player that is coming to the end of their career, I am also not great at playing football so would need a lot of training, I also don't like going out in the rain. So on the SMART goals meter I think this goal isn't achievable. So maybe a more realistic goal would be to play a Sunday league team and trying to win a league in that. It doesn't sound as glamorous but if I was passionate about playing football this would help me follow that passion. Do challenge yourself but be realistic, it is a great feeling to achieve a goal. Do remember to keep reviewing your goals at least once a month, your goals may change throughout the year and your goals will need to change also. There is also another thing you have to think of when achieving a goal, outside influences. What do I mean by this? If a goal of myn was to find a girlfirend to have a loving relationship with. The outside influence would be that I would have to find a girlfriend suitable for me and that could take time. So I may go on 100 dates in the year and not find anyone suitable. A better goal maybe to say that I want a girlfriend to have a loving relationship with so I am going to go on at least 1 date a week. I will work on my confidence and conversation skills. I will eliminate my approach anxiety. I will give people a chance that I wouldn't of done normally. I will goto one speed dating event this year.
I will get to know Jane on reception and ask her out on a date. These are just some examples but they are more achievable goals and these goals will more guarantee that if you don't find that special someone to have a relationship with that you will become a better person while you're trying to find them.
I hope this helps you setting your goals for the year. If you would like my help with motivation, anxiety, confidence and self esteem issues then please call Scott at Oakley hypnotherapy on 07525851033 for a free initial consultation.